Onyxenith's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[newgrounds the legend]

I agree with the last reviewer...

I'm sorry, but it wasn't all that good. Going into it, I was expecting a documentary type movie with actual relevance to real life. Instead, what we get is some weird willy-wonka of a Tom Fulp singing a really odd (and disturbing) song from Spykids. That made sound lose some points. I mean come on, that was messed up.
You really need to work on spelling. All of you people out there too, this is a biggie. What the hell is the point in using text to tell a story if constant errors keep popping up. Like these are the simplest mistaked with spelling, grammar, and punctuation, and they make it look half assed. It makes me wonder if you watch your movies after finishing them, or if you just paste them onto the internet when you figure everything is done. Spelling needs work.
Finally, how can the author claim not to be anti-clock, when the point made in the video is that the clocks are evil bad guys who wish to invade the portal? At least that's what I'm getting from it, anyway. Like, if some clocks make pretty good movies, you could symbolize that by maybe having a clan of good clocks or something. It would be less anti-clock in my mind. Just as a final question: if all was well in the land of newgrounds until the day when the clocks attacked, and this day was represented in the video, how did the security force know to fear the clocks? Like, wouldn't it make more sense if P-bot said "Who are these weird people with clocks for faces?" instead of "Oh no! It's the clocks?" I know those are little things, but they still make the movie look less professional.
Looking forward to a better part two. These suggestions should help to refine your movie making abilities.

[Mr. T Vs Unicron Part III]

Interesting...

Although the plot is all routed from the 80's and it involves Mr. T and the Transformers and all, it was pretty weak. Some things were funny, but there's only so many times Mr. T cereal can pop up and come remotely close to being funny before the whole thing gets old.
But more importantly than that, what the hell is with your picture ripping skills? Those pics all suck. Earth isn't all messed up and bumpy and shit. The least you can do is download a pirated copy of Photoshop and extract all the images you rip off the web so that they actually look half decent. Another thing you do to improve your videos is to resize or move the images so that anything that was on the edge of the original photo is on the edge of the flash screen (This could have improved the scene where Mr. T is kneeling before the Millenium Falcon and one of his legs was apparently cut off).
Work on keeping a relative continuity with Mr. T costumes. He kept on chaging height and pose and clothing whenever any action occurred and it looks kinda lame. You could take the time with Photoshop and use the clone-stamp to smooth out some of the flinging moves. It would require a lot more effort, but your movies wouldn't look so half-assed.

[3D-The Bounty of Dr Agon]

Not bad...

But definately not exceptional. It kinda lacks the element of a well-scripted plot. A few questions are raised:
1) Who is Dr. Agon and why does he have his own planet and paramilitary detachment? (background)
2) Who is the main character and what is his background?
3) Why is Dr. Agon being hunted?

Its good insofar as graphics and music are concerned. A few things you need to work on:
- Voices: they are kinda bad. Its a matter of my own opinion, but I can tell you that there is most likely a few people willing to voice act for good flash like yours. I especially didn't like the baby things. Of course that's been said before.
- Plot: Again, I should point you towards my questions raised earlier. I mean, it was good animation and kewl pictures and all, but it left me with the general question of "What the hell is going on." Graphics, for some, make up the movie. I care more about the plot, and in this one it needs to make more sense, be it through a past events recap in episode two, or a little blurb, or something, but the plot element is seriously lacking.
- Skulls: Okay, so skulls look cool and scary and all of that, but come on? Skulls don't appear like that in nature, and who in their right mind would actively set forth to carve that many skulls into mountains? It really doesn't make that much sense, if you think about it. Meh, my own opinion, but it gives the movie that tired old cliche villain planet that makes the whole thing look like it came out of a campy 50's scifi show.

In summation: I criticize not your artistic talent. It's there, its good, it rockz. What I am trying to point out to you is the necessity to have a balance between plotline and graphics (classic example: the final fantasy movie [which was 92% graphics, 8% plot]). You paint a cool picture, now explain.
Great potential, keep up the good work.
PS to anyone who thinks I am saying I could do better, I can't.

[Taishi 2: Ju-Jitsu Master]

That's not Jui-Jutsu

It really isn't. Thats more Hollywoodized Kungfu crap that no one should believe that they can learn. (I call it cap because its bullshit how these people fight: they moves are too eloquent to ever be effective in an actual fight).
If this movie is to get people to sign up to learn, then they should at least be informed that Jui-Jutsu is not in anyway featured in this cartoon. There really aren't any throws (which is entirely what Jui-Jutsu is comprised of except for a few punches and kicks they teach you) and where the hell did that sword come from. 100% fictional, still great, but definately no Jui-Jutsu.

[8-bit Theater 2]

Awesome

Sorry bout the comment I left in your last one. I am happy that credit is given to the creator of the real 8-bit Theatre, although I am even happier that you did such a good job converting it into an awesome flash movie.
The humour is great, voices are great, the credits were hilarious. A real good all around job and deserving of a 10. Can't wait to see the next one so you can keep it up.
To all who read this: Vote 5 while it loads, it'll save you from having to do it after you watch it.

[Weed - Harmless? P2]

That obviously wasn't the point of the commercial

If you didn't notice, the message is not to smoke pot (in any amount) and then go an drive. You see, smoking pot is all fine by me as long as its done in some garage or nightclub or a friends house or whatnot. Basically, any situation that doesn't involve driving. Why? Same reason its illegal to drink and drive. You can kill people without really meaning to because ur too fucked up to really notice. Getting high and driving is one thing, getting sent to jail for killing a little girl is another.
By the way, if this video is making fun of parents letting their kids ride bikes down main roads, why was this kid on a sidewalk?
Doesn't really make sense.
It was funny, though. Add some sound effects like car noises to add realism to it and you have a pretty funny thing on your hands (if we blatantly ignore the fact that your point makes absolutely no sense given the fact the little girl was on a sidewalk) but I guess I have to see the commercial first.

[The Hate Machine: ep15]

Sweet Movie

Explain the whole French Canadians thing? Like, I know we have a sad military and would have to rely heavily on US protection if under threat of war, but what the hell is with this whole war thing?
PS I don't think the Quebecois look like Mimes, however who knows what crazy French laws they would enforce if they did manage to separate.
PPS How many people know who the Prime Minister of Canada is (little bit of trivia).

[gone wrong]

Blame your own shitty flash skills...

You leave Canada out of this. Go back and take a close look at what made that film the way it was.
Its kinda a bad thing when the characters start analyzing the shittiness of the move they are in.
I can't believe everyone who reviewed this. This is no better than a stick and it should probably be blammed like 70% of the content on NG.
When will the fools learn...?

Smos responds:

Well, some call it humor, some hate the shit out of it. This contradiction is something plato and Aristoteles allready discussed in about 400 BC. (They said that taste, colour and women are things you can't discuss...)

I can't blame you for hating this movie. I just think it's a shame you didn't found any positive things in it... (It's not like I didn't try!)
But that's maybe your character: you don't even allow us to view your profile! What are you afraid about? Critism?
hmmm...

Well, anyway, tnx for the review...
I hope you give other beginning flash-artists more slack...

greetz

[WTC - Superhero]

Interesting Point

However you make the assumption that all those lives were precious, yet how many times more than the number of people who died on Sept 11 die every day in other countries? Much more. I fail to see why this specific incident is so important. Sure, many more thousands lost their lives, but in the grand scheme of things thats such a small percentage that any global minded being such as God is (I make the assumption some sort of creator exists) this would be a very small percentage. Also, this is viewed as an attack on freedom and liberty, yet if WTC had occurred in some other country, it would have not even 10% of the significance it holds now. So what it all comes down to is that the dead people were American. And this sends the message out that Americans are better than 90% (a lot more, actually) of the world to the point where the philosophy of equality in the American Constitution is basically rendered neutral from such hypocracy. In any case, your point about a God allowing this to happen goes with my theory that God merely made all things and invented the laws and mathematical theories of the universe, and that was all he controlled. Therefore, anything that happens comes from him at its roots, but is not capable of change at his hands as he has no control over what happens. He just kind of watches and rules over us all.
But that's my theory. In any case pretty good movie.