Onyxenith's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[License to die 2-Mistakes]

What the fuck was that?

What the hell? A bunch of shitty stick figures doing random and moronic crap to rap music (which doesn't even qualify as music, really). So I am sorry, but if you are going to make a movie please remember each of these very important elements that were lacking in your movie:
1) Draw pictures that are worth looking at, or at least use something other than sticks (even clocks are better characters to look at than sticks).
2) Use a non-shitty soundtrack. Unfortunately that would mean excluding rap music altogether.
3) Coherence allows the audience to realize that the movie has a point or a meaning, or some logic flow of thought. You should try it sometime.
4) Make a movie that takes more than 20 minutes to put together.

'Nuff said. Get better, and your movies will be between mediocre and okay.

[AllYourIraqAreBelongToUS]

Boo

Get a frigging clue. That would have been much better if you had drawn the pictures yourself, or at least adapted the original better, and I'm sorry to say but that was terribly unoriginal and not timely at all.
No one wants to see pictures of war images that don't even make sense in relation to the background music except for some text that was (poorly) added on to them at some random later date.
Terrible. This only spreads the message that the US is on the moral highground in this case (actually not really, it can be taken either way, but I'm guessing it will most likely spead the message that the US can simply ignore the United Nations and go fucking about with the rest of the world).
I suggest this piece of shit dies. It really is quite awful and looks like it took maybe 15 minutes to throw together.

As for you, DeathtotheProtesters, at least Canadians think at all, unlike you stupid yankee morons who go off and start re-colonizing the world.

[CC - Whos on first]

Boo!

If there is ever a book about butchering classic routines, the maker of this terrible flash movie would be the author.
How could you? How could you possibly think this is funny? It's not to people who haven't heard the skit, and it's only funny to those who do know the skit because they can think back to when it actually was funny, when the characters involved showed emotion, used quick delivery, and had facial expressions.
This was awful, absolutely awful. If you want funny flash, don't do it clock style because they are easy to animate but are hard to give any kind of depth to.
And stay away from old jokes. Chances are, people have heard them already. I would rather see new material than rehashed Abbott and Costello skits done by well-drawn yet poorly animated characters who have no depth or emotion to them.
All in all deserving of no more than a 2 or 3.

[Jihad Juice]

Jihad juice?

Please explain to me how fighting for your nation against an aggressive foreign power who wants to impose their own regime and control your national resources as their own is in any way a Jihad?
I'm sorry to point this out to you, but Jihad = Holy War.
The majority of the Arabs fighting for the Iraqi government do not give a shit about fighting for Allah. They are making a point that you can't suddenly come in and kill their leader and put your own little puppet leader in place and get away with it.
So no, Jihad juice really isn't an appropriate name for a beverage that is consumed by the Iraqi peoples. It would, however, suit Al Qaeda and Osama bin Laden.

[Arrogancy: Chapter 3 (SV)]

What the hell was that other guy talking about?

Holy smokes. When you hear things like what that last guy said about this series being poorly put together without a lot of thought being put into it. What the hell? This was obviously well planned out, well put together, and the storyline is very involving.
A couple of things to be improved upon: The text is not absolutely perfect with the actual dialogue. That can be fixed by just going over the sound and listening to it and retyping out the actual dialogue. Even still, it doesn't really matter to the plot of the movie.
You lose some points for the pictures as backgrounds, especially the house because it pixelated and generally looked bad. I loved the whole PAC meeting room thing with the freeze frame images of the ripper and of arrogancy. That was awesome. I love the style, and the animation has its benefits, too. I would rather see a hell of a lot of really cool action pictures than some poorly drawn animation of those same action sequences. The only way to top what you have would be to combine the pluses of both sides so that its very well drawn pictures that go through the whole range of motion, but the style suits what we are seeing now.
If you do choose to make the anime movie version of this, then the last thing is mandatory, but for a simple flash series its not necessary totally, and I like how things are being done.
Keep up the good work.

[Count Dracula 1:It Begins]

Terrible...

When one thinks of Dracula, one thinks of elaborate gothic mansions and dark and depressing backdrops. One would expect to see a very highly stylized type of artwork with interesting camera angles and an eerie sense of gothic horror.
What I saw in this movie was the usage of characters comprised of concentric shapes and a marginally darkish bluish background that does absolutely no justice to the whole dracula sub genre of the gothic vampire genre.
This was very disappointing because, as a fan of Bram Stoker's original work, I feel that Dracula has been slandered. There are certain criteria in terms of the style and the way things are carried out in Dracula films, that this film fails miserably at achieving.
I'm sure my score would be much higher for you if the Dracula aspect of this was left out, because any other vampire and System of a Down would work well together, just not Dracula and SOD. Sorry to burst your bubble, but when one thinks dracula, one thinks terror and suspense in the truest gothic style. What I see in this is a potential entertainment source, but nothing even remotely close to being in any way scared.
The graphics could be better, music choice deals with the style, and this doesn't really seem to fit into any kind of genre of style so it would've worked except for the Dracula/SOD mixture not working out.

And, just as a note, I am not a goth, I just use the word 'gothic' a lot to define what I feel is "gothic" and by gothic I mean mansions with Gargoyles and renaissance-esque vampires, etc.

Work on the style or change the name of the vampire, and you have a winner.

[A story of Noah's Ark]

You obviously don't get it

I'm sorry, but let's get a few things straight for you. The world was very corrupt at this point in biblical times, and god drowned everyone because they had all lost faith in him and were worshipping deities and whatnot. I'd be pretty damn pissed if my worshippers (hypothetically speaking) would go around and worship little bronze statues of nothing instead of paying homage to me, their creator. Hence, they would all go to hell.
Next off, its not a sin to drink or get naked. It is a sin to worship other deities because it blashpemes against the name of the lord.
And in any case, you are far too cynical about the flood story. There are many other ways you could make fun of the bible without concentrating on the flood story, which is meant to be taken lightly anyway.
Finally, as a note, Jesus didn't come along for about another thousand or so years, so its hard to say he killed all of those people during a time when he didn't exist.

[Link v.s DarkLink Trailer]

Meh

A little stupid in terms of plotline. How many times does a real dark evil version of anything emerge and want to kill the good version of itself? It's not like we ever have to battle our dark sides for control of our own lives or anything, so some explanation (even a "Gannon did it with his evil magic" one would work).
Give me a break with the fighting style. I don't like it, it looks too much like a ripoff of the Dragon Ball Z style to suit my tastes, but some people like that kinda thing so meh.
Work on some kind of plotline, fix up the sound, make it a just a small, tiny amount less cheesy, and it'll be eight or nine quality. Good job.

[Love at night fever club]

Dellamorte, shut up!

Dellamorte: Nice to know you've submitted 0 flash movies. Meaning; you haven't even at least tried to make flash movies. You wouldn't know how difficult it is to make decent flash movies because you don't seem to have made an effort. And the same goes to all of you punks out there who give insulting and overly critical reviews and low score: shut up. Just shut up. No one wants to hear about how bad a movie is, least of all if you haven't made something marginally better (hell, why not at least try to make a movie). This is a decent flash animation. I will give it that. Yes the sound sucks, but this is someone's first flash. I give it no special treatment as such, but it is decent without me going "Oh, very good for a first flash."
This is probably 5-7 hours of work. Not bad given the most flash movies that get really high scores can take hundreds of hours to make. So i credit this one's creator with a six. Not bad, but not especially excellent. I wouldn't expect it to be. This was handed in as an assignment and had a due date. Meaning limited amount of time to make it in the first place. And it did a decent job of being good.
Lets compare this to most stick movies out there. How hard is it to draw a stickman. Not very hard. This had a human form for the character. That deserves praise alone, especially since most flashers seem too lazy to even attempt it.
Sorry, but i had to get this out of my system before anyone else decided to give this movie a low score. Good job for a flash animation. There is some room for improvement (there always is) and good luck in future endeavours. And Dellamorte: Give fair reviews next time instead of being a prick.

[Ninjaman]

Hehe..

Boink!
Hehehe!
That was great man, definately not the essence of the darker side of ninja, kind of playing more off of those old kungfu movies with random villains and intense battles, but a good job is a good job. Keep up the great work.